Milkman Days #6: Garrett Cook


Garrett Cook is a freelance editor. He runs bizarro workshops on occasion. He is an editor for the Imperial Youth Review. He is the author of Jimmy Plush: Teddy Bear Detective, Archelon Ranch, Murderland, and Time Pimp. Oh, and he’s the two time winner of the annual Ultimate Bizarro Showdown. Boom.

Garrett’s good for helping you to find your footing in the genre. He knows the people. He knows the books. If you’re unsure where you fit in with the bizarro scene, Garrett Cook just may be able to help you find your way.

For being such an integral part of the bizarro community, Garrett Cook is my sixth and final honorary milkman.

“Day of the Milkman is one of the weirdest damn things I’ve read. And I’m Garrett Cook.”



Milkman Days #3: Spike Marlowe


Spike Marlowe is a superhero. Literally, she wears a mask and everything.

She’s my editor at Eraserhead Press, taking over since Kevin Shamel stepped down.

Spike is the author of Placenta of Love, which was part of the 2011/12 NBAS. It’s a fantastic bizarre love story, and it is touching and bold and bright. Robot pirates, anyone? Spike can make magic happen. That’s her superpower.

She’s an awesome author, editor, and friend. She also writes the Tea House column at Bizarro Central.

Make sure to keep your eyes out for forthcoming works from Spike, including the wonderful chapbook project spearheaded by Constance Ann Fitzgerald: Ladybox.

For always listening to me and helping me talk things through, for being a great editor and friend, Spike Marlowe is an honorary milkman (milkwoman?).

“Lyrical, haunting, beautiful. Look out world—S.T. Cartledge has leveled up!”


Milkman Days #2: G. Arthur Brown


Let me tell you about Gary.

Gary is an author, who is not an author.

No. He’s an author who IS an author, and his first book, Kitten, kind of proves that.

I met G. Arthur Brown, AKA Gary the Pirate, way back in the Fall of 2012 in the bizarro-famous Edgefield hotel in Troutdale, Oregon.

Gary was one of six other authors who would share the next year with me as a New Bizarro Author. His book was the first one in the series which I read, and it was this fantastic surreal thing completely unlike anything else I’d read. No wonder people loved the shit out of it.

Since then, Gary has become the Flash Fiction Friday editor at Bizarro Central, and he’s got some big things coming through the pipelines soon, but I’ll spread the news on Gary’s revolutionary new nipple growth cream in due time.


Oh fuck.

Sorry, G.

Gary is my second honorary milkman. Here’s what he had to say about my own writing:

“Cartledge’s genius lies in his ability to create surreal worlds so immersive that you can’t be sure whether you are reading them or dreaming them.”


Milkman Days #1: Kirk Jones


I’ve got a milk-related announcement to make.


But first, I want to shine some light on a few people who have made everything feel worthwhile.

Say hello to Kirk Jones.

Kirk is a writer, a teacher, a family man.

His first book, Uncle Sam’s Carnival of Copulating Inanimals, came out in 2010, as part of the 2010/11 New Bizarro Author Series. It’s a bizarre carnival romp peddling objectophilia to the masses.

One thing I love about the NBAS is seeing what the authors follow up with. Kirk took his time, but this year, his second book, Journey to Abortosphere, came out through Rooster Republic Press.

In this book, Kirk returns to objectophilia, but this time the objects aren’t animated circus furniture. The objects are just objects. And the objectophile is the main character. He’s in love with certain things. It’s this kind of quirky charm which brings the story together. Journey to Abortosphere is a fantastic follow up to his debut, and from what I’ve seen of Kirk’s work and his future plans, he’s on his way up. Abortosphere was strange and unique in all the right ways, and the weird sexual obsessions and buttholes and giant iron fetus and time travelling battleship are integrated into the story without coming off as obscene gags existing only to shock. He’s a better writer than that.

I was fortunate enough to have Kirk blurb my own book, and for that, he is my first honorary milkman.

“In Day of the Milkman, Cartledge continues to show us his depth and gives us a new glimpse into the breadth of his creative potential. Day of the Milkman doesn’t coast in on the latest cream-coated indy formula for success. This work isn’t a skim derivation of bizarro from preceding works in the genre. In this book, Cartledge carves his own path, rising above the ranks with vivid description, milk-laden metaphor, and high-quality storytelling.”





Don’t buy my book, House Hunter. I’ve got a whole bunch of them I just want to give away.

I’d like to propose a deal: If you buy my new book, Day of the Milkman, today or tomorrow, on Amazon (paperback/kindle, I don’t care!) or Book Depository, or wherever you go for books online, I’ll mail out a signed copy of House Hunter.

Once you’ve bought my book, just click the link sharing the purchase on facebook or twitter and send me a message. Simple as that!